The picture thing on this is driving me crazy - I hate that you can't just access your pictures, you have to go from file to file to find them and then they have to be uploaded. I'll get the hang of it eventually, but right now I have neither the time nor patience. I've got a full schedule of patients today, the only thing that's throwing me is of course the area itself. I use my GPS constantly and am starting to recognize roads, I drove the backway home last night without using it and yesterday made to a patient's house with no assistance at all. The only downfall is you need a road name - and like anywhere else that you live for a long time people tend to "just know" where roads are. I have one patient on my agenda this morning that the nurse that goes there has no idea what the road name is and I can't get it to come up on map quest so I'm a bit stressed on that. In other news David finished the deck out back, I'll take a picture of it when I get a chance although the chances of anyone actually seeing it are about 50/50. Pearl and I trotted up and down the stairs a few times yesterday to test it out and it'll be nice to be able to come in and out the back instead of having to run around the house all the time(this house had no back door but has two front doors about 15 feet apart, I don't know either). Vincent is busy being a pest, we're not letting them out until next week so he spends his free time playing whether you like it or not. He joined me in the shower this morning, he pattered around the edge of tub and played with the shower curtain, I was just waiting for him to fall in. The weather has turned cold suddenly so we're frantically digging for scarves and gloves - brrr!

I'm having a bit of trouble getting used to the new location - how about you guys? The picture thing is a pain in the butt and I have to sign in to blog, but other than that, things are not so bad. I like the snappy polka dot pattern, it looks a lot like one of my favorite knitting bags. Anyhoo, I was back to work today, I had to ask for MORE patients, this close by thing is so hard to get used to and there is only so much sitting and spinning in my nifty chair at my desk I can do. Since I'm used to covering hundreds of miles a week I'm pretty economical with my day and am hyper organized at all times. So,  I drew labs for another nurse, did 4 patients, finished my paperwork and followed up labs for the other nurse and was still done on time. I got my first paycheck and it was ok! I'm still trying to get my feet under me in other areas of my life but working helps a great deal. It makes me feel like there are at least 8 hours that are normal.  The other joy in my life at the moment is the Direct TV - it is so Whoo Hoo! Still obsessed with scary movies, we watched The Ring last night and I made sure the guest room door was wide open when I went to bed because that way there would be no where for that damp sticky dead girl to hide if she happened to wander in here. And it never fails - did you ever notice that the second you turn out the lights and it's super dark and scary that's when you have to go to the bathroom? 

Moving sucks.

As we all know, AOL is closing it's journal site - I've been putting off the migrating thing, because my computers skills are fairly limited. I can push the right button if positioned directly in front of my face, but anything after that is a gamble. So this morning I bit the bullet and migrated almost 5 years worth of blogging - that's a lot of writing. Four moves, five houses, multiple jobs, multiple pets, here, there, births, deaths, graduations, coming and going. All kept track of on my journal. The one thing they're working on and I'm hoping they fix are the migration of the pictures as I've deleted a lot of them from my computer once they're on the journal. so we shall see how this all works out. In other news the pets all did well while we were away, we were a bit worried about how Miss Pants would react to the kennel. She was OVERJOYED to see us, but she hadn't lost any weight and the owner described her as "very energetic, isn't she?" so we will feel a little better about going to Chicago. Cats stayed home and it was nice having someone to come and feed them and keep an eye on the house. I'm back to work tomorrow, hopefully there will be a paycheck waiting for me - it's been too long since I've seen one! I will celebrate of course by ordering from Knitpicks as they are having thier bi-annual 40% off all books sale AND there is some yarn I have my eye on.

What I Like About Pennsylvania

Life has been a bit of a challenge lately, hasn't it? I've had very far and few days that I've felt like I'm on an even keel and not living in dread that something will flood, explode, disappear, or just plain make me crazy. I'm trying not to complain (although that is my nature) but some days that silver lining is too deeply buried in the cloud for anyone to find. But there are some things that I do like about our new home.

Wegmans - Holy crap. Wegman's is like the cadillac of supermarkets, if you've ever been in one you know what I'm talking about. You can find anything you need from imported Monestery cheese (which is alright if you enjoy eating something that smells like old gym socks) to tilapia. We took Ray the last time and he was uber - envious.

Well Water - the downside of having a well of course is if the electric goes out you have no water. The upside though is crystal clear water with no chlorine or chemicals in it. I can use my Brita water pitcher without the filter.

The Leaves Of Course - doesn't even look real most days. I'm going to be doing more visits for work and have my camera ready at all times. Just driving around to the supermarket and back is awe-inspiring.

My Closets - they have little light switches and everything! My entire stash along with my various bags and so forth all fit into one.

Satallite TV - the channels will confuse you but I'm getting the hang of it. They even have a horror channel that plays all my old favorites (Tales from The Darkside, Friday the 13th The Series). When Ray discovered we had a huge amount of sports channels I thought I would have to crowbar him out of his room

Pizza - you have no idea.

The Cheesecake Factory - ditto.

The Distance - no longer having that 12 hour drive makes quite a bit of difference. Realizing you can pick your relatives does too!

So it is getting better, a step at a time

 

Back.

Funerals are such odd creatures, aren't they? In the movies everyone is moping about the church, sleepwalking with grief in thier heavy black clothes - but they're not anything close to that, are they?  Not to say there was no crying or grieving, but it's more a renewal of family bonds, grasping how much someone impacted your life even though you didn't know it sometimes - and realizing things you thought were such a big deal and upset you so much are in reality, nothing more than a blip on your radar. That Liz is important to me and always will be - she'll be there when the tough times are steamrolling through and she'll be there when there's a good sale and she's steamrolling over me. We'll always have that friendship strengthened by 3 generations of family behind it. The Schnieders have been my steps for almost 20 years, do you realize Rick was in high school when he first became my stepbrother and he's now married with 4 children? Aunt Maryann is still wonderful (and still my favorite aunt) and I'll always know it's her laughing,even from across the room. I was so glad I made it home for Grandpa's birthday, we all were - that we were able to celebrate together before we grieved together. The funeral was wonderful - smaller than we thought as most of Grandpa's family and friends have passed on before him. It made me wonder on the way home - what happens now? Even though we didn't think about it, Grandpa was a focus in the family, he was the one we came home for, made sure we visited everytime, the person impossible to buy for but we kept trying. He was the one who had a story for everything and advice to go along with it, who could discuss everything from how to smoke a lamb to how to clean a gun, the person who would eat all your watermelon - the person I toted a glass bowl of ice cream with a real spoon to the hospital ( in July!) for because he needed a decent bowl of ice cream and not to leave the gallon because the damn nurses would eat it. I miss him, but I think as the holidays approach I'll miss both of them more. There will be times and days that will be worse and some will be better - I'll never see an american water spaniel without thinking of him or see a row of boats without that fleeting thought.  I know he's in a better place and is not suffering, but I get so tired of saying goodbye lately.

The Seas Of Change

I heard from Adam the other day - he finally got his mail so he has his birthday cards. He went over to John and Carleen's for his birthday and they had a cake and dinner for him. He was so touched by this - even as an adult it's hard to celebrate your birthday by yourself and he truley appreciated it. David and I are busy packing and so forth, this has just been a crazy couple of months and hopefully will level out after Jackson graduates from bootcamp. Work has been going well, despite the fact I'm taking off more time than I'm spending at work these days! but that's just the way things go. I'm no longer on salary - they pay by the hour and that is very hard to get used to. My other job when I was done I was done, here when I'm done I'm required to go in the office and hang out until 5 pm which is sort of bogus in my opionion. I pass the time by helping out the supervisor with phone calls and paperwork and I try hard not to bother anyone. I asked to be put on a full schedule, the driving here is nothing compared to WV - the furthest patient out is about 20 miles - and that's unusual! Yesterday my total milage for 3 patients was under 20 miles, unbelieveable!

The Circle Grows Smaller.

It just doesn't seem real so far - I know in my head Grandpa has passed on, but I just don't feel it yet. Most people in my age group don't have grandparents, the fact that I'm on the closer side of 50 and still had a grandfather is pretty amazing. That tight feeling my chest is back again, it's ok then I remember and it squeezes right down when I think of how it will be. I know Grandpa has been failing, but he was here, wasn't he? When I saw him last he went in and out but for brief shining moments he was there, laughing about our hunting dog and asking about David. I am so glad we got home for his 90th birthday, that for once we were all together like it used to be. And of course his passing on has brought back memories of Grandma and the house in East Quogue - the joy we had there as kids, everyone there for birthdays and holidays, just stopping by to say hello. The past has for me in the last few months has become a difficult thing to deal with, I've had to say goodbye to my home, my last child, my job  and now one of my remaining grandparents. I know it's the natural order of things and I am so glad I had all this time with him, but right now that just doesn't make it any easier.