A few weeks ago I got a very surprising phone call from one of the committee members of the Pittsburgh Knit and Crochet Festival - they had seen my shawl at the Waynesburg Fiber Arts and asked if I'd like to teach a class. For those of you that don't knit this is the equivalent of being asked to give a speech at Harvard. I really went back and forth about this because I've never even been to a knitting class, let alone teaching one! I met with one of the committee members for an interview and she wasn't worried about that, she said just from our talk she felt I was a good fit and thought I should teach two classes at least. I have to say I was pretty proud of myself. Of course there's a form to fill out fill out as to what I'm going to teach (we had decided circular shawl knitting as that really is my forte!) and as I was going over it I realized I needed a more firm plan than my usual winging it. I had my knitting group last night and decided to go a little early to the yarn shop I frequent nearby where we knit. After a long day of packing and scrubbing out closets and cabinets I certainly needed the break.
The owner was there and I've known her for awhile - I told her I had been asked to teach at the festival and was thinking of taking a class at her shop to get an idea of what I needed to do. She also gives private lessons and I asked if she would be willing to teach me, well, how to teach. She thought for a minute and then said "no, that would be too much work for me" and then proceeded to tell me in no uncertain terms that she felt I was completely unqualified in about 20 different ways! OUCH! Did not see that coming! I'm sure on some level she was attempting to be helpful and she did have a point that I'm going straight to the big time without any practice. But I reminded her they had approached me - not the other way around. And even then, she was sort of Oh Well, Do What You Want. It was not the reception I thought I would get and it was quite the anti-pep talk. Good thing for my knitting group.
When I got there I relayed what had happened and now I was not so sure I wanted to do it anymore. My friends of course rallied and then it was a good thing - there's a lot I had not thought of and am now more carefully considering my approach. I hadn't thought that it is only a 2 or 3 hour class so the pattern should be something teachable, but not too ambitious as it will have to finished at home. That people fairly new to knitting will take the class regardless of their experience level and since it is a money making operation it will most likely not be a small class. My friend Mary said after I get settled with moving she will take me up to the yarn shop in Ligonier, the shop owner has taught for years and will be willing to help me out. And my knitting group is planning on taking my class so there will some friendly faces (and extra helping hands) if I need them. And then I did consider (around 1 am this morning, in the dark with plenty of time on my hands) what if I do bomb? What if I get asked questions that I can't answer? What if someone stands up and yells Go Home You Big Goober! You know what - I won't die. I might want to for a few minutes, but I won't. Even if everyone asks for all their money back, I never get asked again, people throw acrylic yarn at me...... I will have at least tried it. And that's the other side of it, isn't it? The worst thing in life is all the could have beens. The things we were too scared to do and then have to wonder, what if I had done it? The regret of a lost opportunity. So from here on in we only go forward. If I fail, at least I tried. If I succeed, well, haha on you.
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