Killing Time And Other Things

So, I blame this all on David. Last week he was making fun of Bob the cat, saying she was a terrible mouse hunter and could not catch a cold. However, to be fair, there WAS a mouse in the kitchen that Bob was thoughtfully looking at as she munched her Friskies. But Bob took Great Offense at this statement and has been on a killing spree ever since. David was presented the next day with not one, but two dead mouses - well,  one and a half dead mice, but assuming the second one had a front half when she started we can count it as two. She dropped the second one outside the bathroom door while he was taking a shower and just howled it out. The next day she brought IN a live and somewhat confused mouse who had no idea what we were doing. Bob started to show it What We Are Doing which the mouse did not like at all, no siree Bob so I caught it with a container and put it back outside where it promptly disappeared. The next morning David almost stepped into a wee little gut pile in front of the kitchen sink. Ew Bob, ew.

Next were the birds. I was on my way to work yesterday and as I was driving along a bird flew into my grill and bounced off, instantly dead. I hate when that happens. I went a few more miles and as I drove by a crew of birds burst into the air and one bounced off my windshield - I said some very bad words. You have the whole FUCKING UNIVERSE TO FLY AROUND IN BIRDS WHY ARE YOU ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD? Yes - I AM blaming the victim. I narrowly missed a couple suicidal chipmunks, seriously dudes! The ride back was thankfully less eventful and I had the rest of the day to look forward to . When I got home I took the dogs out and we were playing in the old horse pasture of course. I'm studying for that test so they whuffle about while I try to remember all the cranial nerves. There was a bird they were pointing sitting in the vines about waist height, Reuben getting that gleam in his eye. Just as I started to walk to him the bird took off flying low and Reuben - I kid you not - snatched it mid-air, broke it's neck and then pranced around. I was horrified and wildly impressed. The bird not so much.

Did we forget about Molly? Nope, of course not. Last week we were out in the old horse pasture (we are ALWAYS out in the old horse pasture) where Molly found and killed not quickly enough a half grown rabbit. I was a bit surprised because by this time of year all the stupid ones tend to be gone, leaving only the smart and cunning survivors. I told her to stop and she paused, then continued since she was obviously not done yet. And yes, I do let them finish it off - it's quicker and more merciful. I thought that was that but yesterday Bob AGAIN laid waste to the environment - bringing in a live rabbit which was about a third of her size. It was freaking, the dogs were excited - ARRGH. It then disappeared in the space between the dishwasher and cabinet - and died. Yup. David managed to fish it out, he thought it probably simple expired from fright as it did not appear to be too injured. He threw it in the bushes so so something could eat it - and that was that. The whole sorry tail of a family of killers. Including me. Yikes.