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Sunday, December 6, 2015

Your Opinion......Doesn't Always Count.

 I do like Facebook, don't you? I've said it before if it wasn't for that social media I would not have a quarter of the contact with my family and old friends that I now. I enjoy the postings, the news, pictures. What I do not enjoy is the sheer avalanche of political postings, opinions and other sundry items. I love to debate and actually years ago participated in an online debating forum. It was so much fun - there were moderators so if anyone started getting rude they would be privately asked to rein it in or blocked if they couldn't control themselves. But for some reason on Facebook people seem to turn into bullies, don't they? I have taken some people off my newsfeed as I can not take the constant and voluminous postings. If anyone cannot behave I just unfriend them. I unfriended the born again christian - I could take his obnoxious opinion on women, but could not take his constant sending me to hell everytime I disagreed with him. It was the same with a very prejuidiced african american young man - I loved debating with him, the back and forth really made me think and opened my up to an entirely different viewpoint that my own. However -

 when we were debating some point he had no comeback - so he took the lowroad and called me a stupid, fu**king bitch. Unfriend. Yes he did apologize but you know what? I have enough stress in my universe from REAL people and situations, I do not need pretend stress on top of that. People say a lot of things they would not say if they had to face you - in my job if there is an issue with a client I physically go out and discuss it, I do not do it over the phone. Because when people can't see your face and expression it's way easier for things to esculate out of control. And people online rarely give their opinion, they steam roll it - occasionally I will even announce that I'm voting for Trump just to see the hysteria that ensues. But - who decides on who they are voting or changes their viewpoint because they cyber trampled? And people can get wildly obnoxious about thier focused attacks on you - and here's a newsflash. YOUR opinon does not matter. It matters to you of course, but not to me. I don't mind hearing it and might even consider it but in the long run just because you think you're right doesn't mean you are.

Years ago, my very prejudiced grandmother invited me for lunch right before my wedding, the reason being is she wanted me- and I kid you not - to fire my flower girl and uninvite some people to the wedding because they were not white. Are you horrified? I was - but not surprised of course. That was the way she had been raised and was not willing to bend - I did not argue with her. I just simply told her if she could not accept the way things were I would miss her and would understand why she could not come to my wedding. (hang in there, there is a point to this). Needless to say she was not going to miss the wedding and be talked about, she dressed to the nines and attended, she thought the flower girl was cute and was nice to everyone. And she was like that - she may not have agreed with "those people" attending ANY function she was at("those people were actually a pretty large bunch - black, asian, hispanic, she covered all the bases), but you know what? She was gracious and kept her mouth shut, she did not share her opinion and kept it to herself. Even if she was wrong (and that is my opinion) there are certainly a few people that could take a lesson from her.

1 comment:

Donna said...

I've learned a lot from Facebook friends who have different opinions and points of view. You fly pretty low, but I have one atheist friend who doesn't hold back at all. Of course he's very much left-wing, and all that goes with that. I've learned to like him! We've PM'd a few times and found out we even have things in common. In the real world, I would never have had the chance to talk to people with opposing viewpoints from mine. Thank GOD for the Internet.