Rain.

I continue to heal well, my right leg is pretty much healed but there will be some scars, my left leg is doing better, there will be some scars there to which is good because I hate to be uneven. But the infectioned bites look better, just taking awhile. I'm done with all the injections and now moving on. Here in the fall is the rainy season, ugh. It just rains and rains, fog hangs over everything and it's chilly and grey. We did have a couple of days of quasi sunshine and I got 2/3rds of the lawn done but then.... rain... rain..... ugh. Our yard has been infested with crows and all sorts of birds, the walnuts are ripe and fall constantly, reading outside is just asking to get bonked in the head. And I swear the stupid crows bounce them off and aim for me. Jerks. Walnuts are odd because they have a thick, green covering and don't look anything like nuts, but once they fall the covering rots off quickly and they look just like the supermarket. The birds know this too. There were about a hundred stupid crows the other day, squawking and trying to hit me with walnuts, I chased them off but they just sneak back  - I gave it up. 

We went OUT to Rogues this weekend - and sat inside and stuff with Kim and Steve. David forgot he asked them to help paint so we were doodling around the house when Kim called to see where we were. Then David was all "I thought Julia told you the RE moved the photographer to next week so it doesn't have to be done today" then I was squawking because that was a Total Throw You Under The Bus Fabrication since I didn't even know about the painting. Yeah, you can walk that back David. They were fine with it and we got there an hour later and yes, David paid for lunch the scallywag. Going out to eat these days is a bit complicated, the restaurants are trying so hard to follow the weird guidelines to stay open. you wear your mask in, they have a menu propped up for No Touching, then you order through a plexi-glass screen, take whaever you ordered to drink, get a table number.....and then someone brings you your food? Hum. David had no idea what to do about the tip, I mean we were sort of, maybe served?? Maybe not? They had a big tip jar on the counter so he just stuffed 15% in there and let them figure it out. 

We are slowly working on the puppy thing, it will take awhile but it will happen. Brandi and the girls are coming down for Halloween which should be fun, Kim and Steve will come by to visit. Other than that things have settled down a bit, we are still yardsaling a bit when we find one. We went to one the other day - wow! The road was a winding gravel road so high up my ears popped - but it was fun. I got a few things and so did David, a fun way to spend the afternoon. The house did not get listed this week due to the rain which worked out for David - he wanted to get a few more things finished and then we just sit and wait. Hopefully for not too long. 

 

Changes

There is a buddhist saying that life is static, ever changing. The past four months have been a weird rollercoaster of events from super fun highs to devestating lows. I had my last rabies vaccine injection this past Tuesday, it went surpisingly smoothly and quick, not much fanfare . I have been injected over the past two weeks about 17 times - she asked me if I'd like a flu shot and I very quickly said NO - we both cracked up laughing, out the door I went, done. The bites on my lower right leg are healing up well  - the one on my thigh which was the worst is taking it's time - it's very annoying. I had contacted and sent pictures to the Oregon Wildlife and Fishing to see what they thought - the concensus was a raccoon, a coyote or another dog, but leaning towards the raccoon. The dog one was interesting but whatever it was it didn't make any noise at all and I don't think Rueben would have gone after another dog that aggressively. Not to mention we've never seen one loose dog in the year and a half we've lived here, so one hanging out under the tree next to the house  at 4:30am would be super odd.  I guess I'll never know for sure. 

I picked up Rueben's ashes today - cried of course. I cannot wrap my head around the fact that four months ago I had two silly,lively dogs - eating cheese, playing with each other and hogging the bed - to nothing. The silence here is deafening some days - the hardest part is coming home to just opening the door - no joyful dancing, no rush to go out, nothing. We are starting to look for breeders and I've sent a few emails inquiring but we're going slow. Grief can cloud judgement and I don't want to accidently end up with two irish wolfhounds because that was what was available now and regret it later.

 I miss them both so much. 

We got the bill from the ER - wow. Super glad I have good insurance now! My co-pay was $200 and I have to pay a part of my deductible so the whole thing was $450 which sounds like a lot until you see the bill was over $10,000 - Jeezy pete!! My insurance back in PA would have probably covered the 8 dollars and  65 cents so I'm very grateful.  Ten grand - and  that doesn't even include the 3 following  injections. The The dogs get a booster every year and I think it's 30 bucks, it's crazy how much everything costs. But I'm done and that's the important thing. 

I've been knitting a lot lately, I bought myself a Namaste Train Case in red from Jimmy Bean Wool - they're on clearance for the weirdest of reasons and I really want to write to them to ask but not sure if it would be PC. They are discontinuing the Namaste knitting bag line because - and forgive me if I'm being racially insensitive - the word "namaste" is offensive to some people???? The product line has been around for over 30 years and I cannot figure out how the word is offending people, as far as I know it's hindi for "peace" - I don't know either. Anyone figures it out PM me - but I'm keeping an eye on the website and might order one or two more bags before they are all off the market. I've been knitting up socks and trying out different needles which is fun. A friend of mine gifted me with a set of Neko needles which are like double points but bent in the middle - they worked great. Now I'm trying out Addi Flips which have a short flexible cable in the middle, they are interesting - the size is smaller than I'm used to so hopefully the socks will come out. 

Friday we went to Canon beach with Kim and Steve, we'd never been before. We went to Ecola park first to see the cliffs and the lighthouse. The light house is called Terrible Tilly, no one can get to it! It was shut down like ten years after it was built because it's too dangerous to man, a private concern bought it and now it's full of creamation ashes. Weird! After we went to Canon beach, then out to lunch, then walked around. For east coasters it reminded me very much of East Hampton - shopwise and pricewise!! I did find a yarn shop, Kim was teasing that I can smell yarn and I didn't buy anything. Since I'm trying to knit up the sock yarn I have I cannot even make myself add to the pile, but it's always fun to look. It was such a lovely day and we had a great time. David continues to work on the house, it has been shown twice and it's not on the market yet so keep your fingers crossed! I so want to be done with that too.

 

It Never Gets Easier.

We have owned.....hmm.....8 dogs together through almost 40 years - 8. We've had them pass in their sleep, from very old age, the last 3 all died from aggressive cancers which floors me. We have never had one escape and get run over thank goodness. I'm usually not great about it, who is? but realistic. Your dog will not live as long as you do, we all know that - but this. Since I was fourteen I have never not had a dog. That's almost 45 years of ongoing walks and pets, lapsitting and waking up to being stared at by a party who would like to go out. Now. 45 years of mixing dog food, occasional waving of a well chewed shoe in front of the (fake) sorry dog, cleaning up after a not yet trained puppy, endless strolls around parks, yards and forests. Car rides with the windows rolled down, scrubbing the delighted poo-encrusted roller, shelling out a bazillion dollars for the best kennels when we vacation to exuberant reunions when we return.  

Losing one dog was devestating of course, but we were starting to feel better, had just started asking around about breeders....then Rueben and I got attacked, then we had to put him to sleep - I think my theme song is now Wake Me When September Ends -  and no,the raccoon bites didn't kill him but I do think it accelerated his decline. No difference though, he is gone regardless of the whos and whys. And now, now....

we have no dogs. 

I cannot get over how quiet the house is, when I come home there is no joyous leaping, no barking for me to hurry, no greeting. I have a constant feeling of - it feels like I've forgotten to do something, you know it was something but you just can't put your finger on it.... I am not used to having no reason to go outside many times throughout the day. Over the years I've gotten good walking and reading - I love to read and would take my book out when the dog went out, trailing behind or sitting on a bench under the trees while Molly and Reuben took note of who had been in the yard, marching around Completely Offended when they caught the scent of some local tresspasser. So I take myself out to go sit reading under the trees, it's very much not the same but I do it. The other night I got up around 2:30am and found myself in the living room - it took me a minute to realize I was about to let a non-existent dog out to pee, I guess this will take a while. 

I'm healing well, I did one day at work last week and will be returning tomorrow. I take my last antibiotic pill tonight and although it's still pretty sore all the wounds are healing and are no longer red, angry looking things. I wore pants for the first time in almost two weeks yesterday. My last rabies vaccine is Tuesday - I'll be VERY glad to be done with that! I still have bouts of crying but that is getting less too, the house is just so quiet. Yesterday Kim and Steve met us over at the flip house, they had volunteered to paint - David has lost a lot of time between me and Rueben so he welcomed the help. With the four of us we got all the walls, ceilings and trim done, then we went out to a late lunch at a sit down restaurant - it was nice to have some normalcy in my day back. The flip house should be on the market pretty soon and in the meantime I've started looking a little for when we can a puppy. This has been the longest 3 months ever.