Morning Shinanigans

So, what exactly happened this morning? I got up a little after 4am as usual ( I know it's weird but well, it's me).Since he's on prednisone which makes him pee like a madman Rueben goes out right after I get up.  I put on my shoes, coat, his electric collar. There are no lights and I don't turn on the porch light, I just beep the collar so I can see where he is, it works for us. I know the yard well and enjoy looking at the late stars while Rueben sees a man about a horse. This morning it was raining,  I let him out while I got my umbrella and the next thing I hear is Rueben yipping and barking at something - I still don't know what - growling and snarling - I dropped the umbrella and ran, yelling Rueben's name at the top of my lungs. He was on the ground and in the pitch dark I could see him locked in a fight, I screamed his name and started kicking towards them, not hard but trying to get whatever it was to leave. My foot connected a little, I kicked out again still yelling  expecting it to stop and run away - and that's when it turned it's attention to me. 

It sank it's teeth deep,deep into my thigh and I really started screaming then - you cannot imagine the panic and pain, it would not let go. It finally dislodged and went right back at me - I have about 4 bites on my right leg, claw marks down the entire length. David first could not make out what all that noise was and then bolted out of bed, it was bedlam out in the yard, Rueben was in full gear, I was screaming blindly and that thing was still going at us. He put the light on and started yelling and finally, FINALLY it left. Rueben staggered up to the door, David not realizing I was injured was looking him over. By the time I got to the door the blood was just pouring  - you read about a pool of blood but let me tell you, standing in your own personal pool is a little freaky. David ran and got towels to hold pressure - I could not stop shaking, Reuben got a couple bites on his back leg but seemed ok. I finally calmed down enough to think clearly for a few minutes - I took a quick shower to wash out the wounds, dressed in a skirt to make it easier and off  we went to the ER. David pointed out on the way there that I could now cross Being Attacked By A Wild Animal off my bucket list. 

I enjoyed when asked why I was there to say "I was attacked by a wild animal", it is also the most epic sick excuse EVER. I had texted my equally early riser co-worker to ask if she could let them know I wouldn't be in and after a little sympathy got a request for pictures which I sent because I would have asked for them too. I got some bandages before I went in as I was still rather cheerfully bleeding all over the place. After I got settled on the gurney the doctor came in and a few other people because believe it or not it 's not every day someone comes in looking like a meat pie. The doctor agreed that it was most likely a large racoon, the wounds are not large enough for a bobcat and I'm not sure if I would have survived that. At that point it was decided I would be getting a full course of rabies injections, a tentanus shot and antibiotics since the alternative would be hunting down the animal, killing it and bringing it in. Not to mention it's not normal behavior for a wild animal to keep attacking like that. I sent David home to check on Rueben and  come back. With coffee. Please. 

So, rabies shots. 

They do not give them in the stomach anymore. 

It's given with a large, IM needle and it's multiple shots as they inject around the bites. I got about  8 around the bites on my right leg which hurt, but tolerable. The two deep IM injections I got into my left thigh was historic and epic and any other word you can think of. Wow. Ouch. Not done yet! One more rabies vaccination on my right detoid and a tetanus on my left. Oh, the wounds needs to be washed out, don't they? The nurse asked me to scale my pain as the tech was washing out the deep one on my thigh, I casually scaled it at a 41 until she was done then it was a 4. David came and got me and we headed home, Rueben's back leg was swollen now and he was limping. So off David went AGAIN, this time to the vet. Mr. Boo is now on predinsone, antibiotics and  pain medications, given his current terminal condition this is the last thing he needs. We gave him his pain meds and the prenisone he missed this morning and are just letting him sleep. I have my second rabies shot on Friday morning - yes everything really hurts, I suppose it could have been worse. But honestly, this is bad enough, thank you.